DATE: 07/07/2008 20:05:26 / MOOD: angry

I am sitting here all pissed off, and you can guess why.  I HATE BUSH!  The man is a fucking idiot!  I am so fucking tired of the fact that he is STILL in office, STILL the president, and STILL not being hung by a war crimes tribunal.  He is not the only one that deserves the noose.  I mean, come on!  The man is a neo-nazi in office!  His croneys in the Skull and Bones Yale neo-nazi club are all guilty, so why the fuck does this world wait and wait to impeach him.  At very least, I decry that the World Court at Hauge in Europe ought to openit's eyes and seriously start proceedings against all parties guilty of war crimes.  This doesn't stop at Elder fachist Bush and his son, no way.  This would include those guilty of EVERY war crime on this planet.  Eastern European, African, and ALL those guilty must be delt with.

As far as the Olympic games go, I sure as hell hope that the Crimes against humanity are looked at very carefuly by those in charge of the World Court.  War crimes, crimes against humanity, and acts of terror commited against ANYONE by state powers are all to be punished.  Then we can have a society worth living in.  Are we going to stand up and do something about it?  I want to!  I am one person.  Will you take up the cause where I lead off?  If you do you will have my admiration and respect.  Write letters to the newspapper in your city and send them to the editor.  Start petitions, start blogging like me, and someone plese start a coalition to unite the lone individuals that need a unified voice against this treason against mankind that we all see, realize, and hope to overcome.  We need an organization to stand up and fight for us.  Do we here a massive plan here?  Yes.  Now we must search out which group will unite us, assist us in our fight till the end, and uni-lateraly see the end of the whip against our backs... the bullets from our flesh... and the war against our humanity.  Remember as well, that those fachists like to worm their way into everything we do.  They, such as the Governor of California, are pretending to be on our side when in fact they march beside us... as wolves in sheeps clothing.  Yep, Arney is a neo-nazi fachist pig!

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DATE: 08/10/2007 02:31:46 / MOOD: don't know

I swear it is not me, and yet it sems to be a person that was just like me.  Some one is haunting me.  I think it was a blues man from the sixties or seventies that died of a heroine overdose.  I don't use the drug, and I am scared that I may be unable to shake this spirit from me.  I seem to have a lot of his mannerisms, but I am a different person.  Was I the person that died, or is that person attached to me some how?  I am hearing his voice, and had an odd conection with him on a psychic level.  This happened to me today.  I was waiting for the bus and I had the strangest feeling that I was conected to a man in the past.  He may have lived in Houston.  I had just gone to a catholic church, and gone to see my aunt at a doctor's office.  Then I went to book store.  I could have passed through some weird moment, as I fell asleep in the Church.  I was up all night and I fell asleep at the church.  I was laying down and then I passed out.  I awoke with a sense of peace, and distinctly remember that I was thought of as a derilict.  What the hell?  I am freaked out by this all.  Weird things keep happening to me.  I think that God did this to me for some reason or another.  I don't know what is going on!  Remember the Nine Inch Nails song that says "They keep calling me... Keep on calling me."  I swear that is about dead people.  I think that it is even called Dead Souls!  I used to sing that song all the time.  What the hell?  I keep having thoughts that I don't want to have, and I can't explain them.  I have no reason or understanding as to why, but I can not stop them...  I am sorry if this is upsetting the dead man, but I can not go on wwith this psychic weirdness.  I just got the most odd look from my aunt's cat!  Auuuugh!  I am going to say a few words for the dead.  May you rest in eternal salvation.  Be at peace!  Now will they leave me alone?  I have obviosly dabbled in the wrong magic, been touched by the wrong person, or I have been affected by the wrong environment. I have been all over this country, to Mexico, and to Canada.  I have smoked a lot of pot in the past, though  have since quit.  I have been at amazing places, done strange things, and done some feats of magic.  I have seen miracles, and have pplayed a lot of instruments.  I am also a singer of some quality when it comes to the blues.  Was I a blues hound in my last life?  This shit does not make sense!  I have experienced an angel or two, and seen some odd visions and things I won't discuss.  I just need to say  this and then I will relax.  I don't need this anymore.  I have to be free!  I am not the madness, just the man.  The madness will fade.  I am not the past, but the present.  I am not there in the then, I am now in the present.  I have no power beyond today, and I am able only to work on today and then tomorrow.  I do not need this past anyway, I need a future.  Am I so alone that I am my own soul mate?  Is there any one I can dicuss this with other than a priest?  I just know that today God did a thing to me that has affected me in an odd way.  I will work on this with a clear head when, and only when, I am able.

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DATE: 08/08/2007 18:50:51 / MOOD: bored

I wake up and realize there is more to life than just complaining.  I want to rant all day and all night about how much I hae Bush, but I am going to run out of material.  Hate is not to be my motivator in life.  So to change speeds a bit... I will tell you about a few things I love about my life.

 I love my new battle hawk.  It is a short version of the 12 inch mowhawk.  I wanted to grow my hair out and have a propper mohawk, but I was not able to stay away from the trimmer on my electric razor.  I plan to dye it red.  It will be amazing when it grows out a few more inches or so, and I love it as it is now as well.

I love punk rock music, but I get weird and start thinking of the days when no one believed that I was a PUNK.  I had to lay it down for a few years and turn on the power to explain it to my family.  I went gagga and did quite a bunch of overkill in the explaining and insisting.  I feel a little bit silly now as I look back and realize I was forcing PUNK ROCK down every one's throat.  I was adamant abot being the anti-fachist and the punk that I wanted to be, and I wish that I had just gone ahead and lightened up.  My sister called punk rock "Junk Punk" as she thought I was being closed minded in my vocalization of how she listens to Sarah Mac whats her face and was still checking out underground music that I thought was not her style.  I hope that she realizes that I was just vocalizing a comment, and like the fact that she has expanding horisons.  I wish she didn't hate PUNK ROCK so much though, as she would realy dig it if I weren't into it I suppose.  I love the angst and the rythems of the music.  I love the anti-social aspects and the expressions of alienation raly hit home with me.  I had been locked up before for wearing safety pins and making the childish remark that they kept me safe.  FUCK THAT!  The fact that I was still believing, if ever so slightly so, that something was going to save me ment that I had some reason to exist!  I had lost ALL hop after that and started drinking at bus stops and lost all hope.  I couldn't save myself, at least then, and I believe it was my friends and music that brought me back to life.  I don't miss the bad times, but music was my lifeline and I held on tight.  Now I am still suffering, and that is a shame, but  am better off in my improved life.  I learned a lot of things, but mostly I needed a good shower and a lot of love!  I am still smoking cigaretts though, but I was smoking basicly trashy filters since  had no money to but real cigaretts.  I still feel my self linering around the corner as if I have never left the falling apart stages in some pathetic sense.  I hope my essence finds happiness and release from all the pain I felt back in those days.

I love my two cats Magus and Orangy.  They are my buddies and my only sons.  I had to make a choice to not have a child that I was responsible for, and it was a mutual desision between my self and the woman.  I wish that I had the chance to ease the pain I caused him or her.  I will some how get a wife and forgive myself for the death of the child.  I would have done the proper thing if I had the chance to do it all over again.  I will love any child that i father in a deep way.  Even I realize that in this world there are chances to have a decent life and a good home for a child.  I love you in whatever place that you are in child!  I will have to also say that could of, would of and should have are the things that make up all of our regrets and I must move on...

I love that I am 33 years old and have no sexualy transmited diseases.  I have stayed away from having many sexual partners, at most times because I couldn't get laid.  Either way i have remained healthy.  I feel great and feel I have acomplished something here.  I can still love and get married and have a family. I had my primary care phyisician check me out, and the only problem that I have is the fact that I have to quit smoking.  I am going bald and I had mono in High School, but that rounds out the problems  have, beyond having a mental case for a head.  I take the pills that I am perscibed and feel as ordinary as the next guy.  Iam not a basket case, but many of us did not survive this drug era life without some form of mental difficulty.  Some people are still afraid of the mentaly ill, but there are more and more cases of illness being found in people everyday.  You can rellax, we are not monsters.  Visit www.nami.org for more information about the illness you or your family might have, as well as to educate yourself on what can be done for all including your friends.

I love many things in life like being able to walk, my health, my views, my friends, my family, and my inteligece.  I will never miss out on the better life, as long as I keep these things close to my heart.  Just be thankful for what you have and don't over estimate the way that life can pull it away from you.  Tie a knot and hold on!

Remember it is love that holds together the universe.  The law of attraction is what bonds life together.  You must be able to grasp that as it is a scientific cocept even dicussed in Physics and Jim Morrison's song when he sing "Love hides in molecular structure."  The man was right!  Be kind and realise that you might not live forever!

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DATE: 08/07/2007 18:48:23 / MOOD: angry

You must realize that telivision is one of the very things that is wrong with our society. It is the cause of many problems in our culture.  Advertising, bankers, television, religion, conservativism, racism, narcs, war profitering, patriotism, pedophilia, mental intitutions, dirtypolitics, war, prostitution, denial of rights, human slavery, kidnaping and gambling away the wasted future of this society... all can be explained by the twisted plots of some sick members of society, even political office holders in this country.  Some of the sickest members of the government are members a crime sydacate that exploits male children.  The elected officials also deal with war criminals in forign countries.  They prop up Dictators, and fund them.  The world hasn't gotten any better, only worse since the Eigties.  This is a sick society once you scrape the surface, and below that is an evil that none should have to fathom.  Cops are croked, as allways, and the military is as well.  Wake up and destroy the perverse parts of society you live in, and learn to smash the state until we end fashism.  The punk rock movement hasbeen stereo typed as a drug crazed bunch of social degenerates since it's inception.  This is what they did to the Hippies.  Look at how amazing they were and how dead on they were in their atempts.  Don't fall for the deluted freak roles handed to you by society, especialy if you are young.  We are around from the earlier wave of PUNK ROCK, and I can tell you there are a lot of positive things being done to improve life on the planet by punks and adherents of common sense as we know it to be.  Politics canbe difficult, but you must not stop there.  You must read, and regenerate the punk rock ethics of the past as a way of life.  DON"T EVERSTAY DOWN THE PATH OF THE REPUBLICAN, PLEASE!  Those monsters are the worst human beings on the planet, followed by the democrats!  Be, if you would be, an anarchist and learn what that means before you jump into it.  If we are to ever save this brainwashed planet then we must save it together colectively.

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